"Excess Wiggling Is Not Covered"

“The warranty does not cover excess wiggling,” our son reminded 'him'. “There are limits to its coverage”, he continued. ... I guess I should look at the clause nullifying 'excess wiggling'. It was an unusual problem for the most 'wigglingest' male dog we'd ever had. ...

How does a large dog, weighing in at 75 pounds, manage to bend his whole body, non-stop, in a horseshoe style of motion, while wagging his tail, too? And so our precious Mr. Wiggles continues on his merry wiggle way as he happily carries the 'gift' in his gentle, oh so sweet pink mouth. 

 

Mr. Wiggles, our yellow male retriever, is the messenger of all things, good. He is in a perpetually happy state, always happy to see his cousins and his 'brothers' whenever they come to visit. He is Mr. Wiggles and Mr. Happy, all in one. ... 

 

In New Scientist, a look at our animal pets brings us to our senses. They are definitely intelligent, maybe more so than we think they are. They do not possess language skills but intelligence is not necessarily measured by that given standard only. (Wiggling was not mentioned.) Our pets might not like us as much as we think or even hope for but they are knowing and willing to teach us. ... Dogs communicate and show affection in many different ways. They demonstrate to the rest of the world who they truly are, each and every moment. They help us cope. Our mental and physical health are strengthened, immeasurably, by their inclusion in our lives. These animal gems remember and never forget the good, the bad and the ugly. They bark and growl when they feel powerless or in danger. They 'protect' us from danger - real or imagined. Our Mr. Wiggles is no different, except for that one startling quality!

Our furry teen has been a pup-in-motion, most of his young life. Assigning warranty coverage for his never-ending motion had never been considered. The comical idea of warranty coverage for Mr. Wiggles' wiggling had never entered my mind, until it was mentioned, in a comical sort of way. With strangers, however, he is quiet, unmoved, refusing to budge to the absurd or anything else. He is unsure and his actions reflect that. Mr. Wiggles watches intently, to confuse and befuddle us all. He refuses to move. I am uncertain as to what to expect next. It is an unusual side to this magnificent beast. At breakfast, he marches, with great resolve, in quick stride, in a straight line to the dining room, focused on what happens there. Food happens, in all unpredictable manner, especially those delicious morsels of yellow stuff, called eggs, full of the incredible healthy ingredients for life. ...

Mr. Wiggles is a dog, with a purpose, wrapped up in a serene beautiful face. I call him Big Face 'cause he has one, a gentle, large, pink one that is always aware and thinking about the next moment. When I look into his eyes, I see wisdom beyond his species and a future full of wonder and miracles to come. The warranty covering Mr. Wiggles cannot be extended, he is reminded, by his 'brother' on another occasion. (I guess his wiggling is a preexisting condition so excessive wiggling cannot be covered, I muse.) I smile again at the silly thought. 

 

Mr. Wiggles must curtail this non-stop action, lest the warranty become null and void. Over the decades, our canine children, the other species we love, have assisted our human ones to develop into caring, funny men. There was no warranty covering our furry family members, back then. Those furry gems rarely over-indulged in the gifting and wiggling practice, until now, with our newest family member, Mr. Wiggles.

Our pup in-motion is on duty, endlessly, ready to gift, lick and wiggle. I am tired just watching him. How was this wiggling trait of his formed? Granted, he was 'trained' early, by 10 weeks, to 'go outside', though it was good timing, on our part, that probably made that happen. How had this unusual character trait been created? Were we simply the 'environment', triggering his genetic self-expression of wiggling? He does not growl but leaves it up to his companion, 'Sally' to make those sticky 'decisions'. She is his leader, his mentor. His job is to wiggle. It's simply what he does or is it who he is? His sister, however, leaves nothing to chance. All things are potentially evil, she thinks. She barks, he listens, while excited that company is here. 

 

When confused or happy, Mr. Wiggles walks with a purpose while carrying anything, perhaps a sock or mitt he has found. He is always poised to 'change direction', however, should a stranger appear. The floor and adjacent rooms are awash with his continual gifting purpose, his constant need to please and wiggle. The objects are everywhere. He is always on the look-out for that soft squeaky toy or antler bone to offer to his mom, dad, 'brother' or 'sister' and cousins when they are near. Mr. Wiggles desire for food or that special treat has him 'dropping in' for a quick look into the kitchen or dining room to see if it's time to eat. ... Do not forget us, Mr. Wiggles reminds me with his intense look and wiggling. Talk to him directly and his bodily gyrations become even more rapid, more intense - something akin from the Cirque du Soleil. Oh, My. 

 

What an engaged little guy, you are. Calm down. We do not want your 'warranty' to expire, little pup. You have many years to live and a spine that must remain supple, ready to carry you into your golden years. A warranty that does not cover excess wiggling struck me as funny. Never had we been so blessed with a male retriever who was so relaxed, engaged, in harmony, with his environment and the 'creatures' within it, that my adult son, a character in his own right, would remark that Mr. Wiggles' warranty could be in jeopardy. Yes, it could. I took note. Be careful my sweet little guy. Your wiggling is a precious commodity, warranty or not!