The Invisible Cloud Came Running

It lunged from behind the bush. Its telltale shape, characteristic white stripe and bushy tail, had come to visit that day. “Stay away from me, little girl” he seemed to scream. “Go away”, he warned “or I will let you have it”! And so he did. Little 'Ella', our son and 'daughter's' 17-pound, 16-month old mini-schnauzer, now had something to call her own. It was a moment to remember. Eight days ago, Ella met a skunk!

It was a sunny day when the gunslinger came to town waving his weapon towards all who would dare come near. Ella stood there, realizing, that, perhaps, tempering her enthusiasm for investigating all things that moved outdoors should have been seriously considered. One look should have sufficed but her zealous, youthful, happy-go-lucky nature had not yet matured. She did not know that a skunk was a different kind of soul mate, not easily understood or liked by many in the neighbourhood. They had met in a most unlikely way. ... (Mall Cop, her older brother, was kept inside, watching and wondering when he was going to be allowed outside to investigate, too.)

A flurry of activity to contain and, hopefully, eliminate this horrid smell, began immediately. "What was all the fuss about, anyway?" Mall Cop mused. "I didn't see anything.") Volunteers were on site, working in tandem, to remove the odorous cloud that had enveloped this innocent, young pup. A tiny, joyful bundle of energy had been attacked by a skunk. She did not deserve it.  

'Ella' hoped her 'new costume' would soon disappear. Nighttime would be here. She would be coming indoors to sleep, perchance to dream, if at all possible, without that scent following her into the house. Though she was a talkative little thing, at times, she always listened whenever mom or dad called her, unlike her older brother. Typically, he would pontificate before strongly being advised to follow instructions, now. ... (But he was still "sooo goood", his dad would often say.

Miss E's compliance that day was a top priority. A stringent washing routine was begun. All regular business ceased that afternoon. An emergency run to the pet store for specific bathing remedies and a strict adherence to bathing protocols of untold dimension began in earnest. An unthinkable act had occurred. A heavy male presence dominated the scene, all working together to help purify this cute little thing and restore her to her former sweet self. (Her older brother could only wait and wonder, “Was I next in line for a bath? I just had one. Why do I need another, so soon?" I was disheartened when told of the nuisance event, but comforted by the lessons it was about to teach us all.

Thank you, Mr. Skunk, for bringing life to a standstill for all of us. 'Ella' had not been attacked by a predator whose modus operandi might have been claws, sharp teeth and terror! She had been touched by an odorous cloud, an invisible dome, a skunk's unique signature of protection. Ella would live to tell the story. She did not require a vet's visit or emergency surgery. ... A car had not hit her. ... She had not been kidnapped. ... She was still here, in one piece and in the same body in which she awoke that sunny morning.

I thought of the coyotes, raccoons and other menacing creatures that I have met in the country that could have easily confronted her that day and altered our whole family's emotional landscape, in an instant, forever changing the lives of at least 13 people. In those instances, she would not be with us. Even other dogs could have posed a threat to her. This time it was a skunk, a very 'strong' reminder of what did happen and more importantly, what did not. 

Miss Cutesy Pie's personality remained in tact, though more cautious about returning outside, the next day, where 'it' might be lurking, somewhere, for her return. ... Within 24 hours and after many specialized bath treatments, she was good as new, smelling like toasted coconut now, up close and nose to nose. Our little girl was fine.

The outdoors is called that for a reason. Indoors is generally a safer, more predictable place, where we  are generally the masters of our own fate.. Mother Nature's home is a place we visit. It is not our place. Danger, beauty, the unpredictable and unimaginable, in all forms, are some of her endless disguises. We must be respectful and careful. Her power is endless and far-reaching. 

Ella resumed her activities with her brother, Mall Cop, the next day along with her high energy, playful, happy, overzealous cousin, Mr. Wiggles. ... She could outrun them both and send them on their way, playfully. With Mr. Skunk, however, it would be a different kind of story. Even if he went away, he could still be with her, in a not so funny way!

The Country Girl Inside Me

Several weeks ago our laundry pump stopped working. Located in the basement, this small piece of machinery that moves waste-water from the washing machine up to the septic tank, did not move anything, any more. ... I delayed calling the plumber, wanting to empty and clean the sink, where the water collects, before it is sent on its merry way. His assessment-visit, weeks later, only delayed fixing the problem. I was not an emergency. Others were ahead of me. That was OK with me. I had waited. ... By now, I'd been without a washing machine for over a month. Waiting a bit longer was no big deal. ... (The sump pump, the other 'pump' in the basement is a constant reminder of its true intent: to keep outside water at bay, at all times. If it  malfunctions, it makes the laundry pump look good.) 

I thought of our dogs and realized they deserved better than this. I had been running out of towels, clean bedding and scatter rugs for them. (Their outdoor play area, topped with straw, was a muddy surface now, with recent rains.) Clean towels etc. were always a necessity for our animals to protect the carpeting, and to wipe them down whenever it rained, snowed or when 'mysterious' matter appeared on them. (It soon dawned on me that the washing machine was not broken. Its companion was.) Laundry could still be done, albeit, with a different approach. ... I would be the substitute laundry pump, for as long as necessary. ...  A gorgeous sunny day, with soft breezes, greeted me the next morning, perfect for drying clothes outside. ... The time had come to revert to the country girl inside me and begin the task of carrying and emptying pails of water to the upstairs bathroom. ... With an average of 8-10 pails per load, I began my early morning jaunt, up and down. ...I washed four loads that afternoon. It was an exhilarating respite from my normal routine. ... Later that day, I watched as the dogs began to sniff, roll and stomp on their freshly washed/air-dried beds, in the room they called home. ... It hadn't been that clean for weeks, they must have been thinking. (“Thanks mommy.”)

Nearly 40 pails of water had been disposed of with great vigor that day. I felt refreshed and my bones, muscles and ligaments received a good workout. ... Strength and attitude are everything. This current laundry pump fiasco reminded me of another time-years ago - when I had to carry water upstairs to the bathroom to dispose of water. ... Our septic system, then, was old and could only handle one load of wash per day. We lived in a town, on the verge of installing sewers, so upgrading, beforehand, was a waste of time and money. Our sons were toddlers then and were the impetus to do the one important load per day, until we moved, years later!

Electricity costs more in the country. Switching to an 'approved' fireplace insert - 25 years ago - resulted in significant savings in our heating budget. We now buy firewood and the momsey has split it, stacked it and keeps the home fires burning, with it, especially, during the freezing temperatures of winter. Going without electricity, on many occasions, for long periods of time, serves to remind me that full time camping could become routine, in the future. 'Showering' with bottled water served as a reminder that anything was possible. Baking a carrot cake on the barbecue required new problem solving techniques not asked of me previously. A new age had dawned. ...When the things we take for granted are taken away from us, even momentarily, it is then we realize how important they were, all along. It is then that the country girl appears to whisper that modern day conveniences have disappeared because circumstances have been altered.

Our first house was a simple little structure on a 'floating' foundation-(no basement)-with a small bathroom, containing an aluminum shower stall. There was nothing glamorous here. ... But it was ours, as 'down to earth' as it could possibly be. (I was teaching full time, then.) Washing laundry was done in the kitchen with a movable, hand operated appliance. One or two items per 'load' was all it could handle. ... Still it was an improvement. Going to the laundromat had lost its appeal. ...When the laundry pump is working, all is well, for now. ... Having cleaned up a few basement messes, over the years, serves to remind me that 'chaos' can happen, without warning. The 'country girl' inside is there to clean, scrub, carry water, wood, cook, - the camping way, when the unthinkable, the unimaginable happens. Touching base with ourselves, in a basic way, reminds us that we're OK and everything else will be, too, eventually. We adapt because we must.

The luxuries of modern life: running water, electricity, and appliances all serve to remind us how fortunate we are, especially, when they cease functioning - for a moment or two. For me, the good things in life can be as simple as clean laundry and  fresh water. That is what the country girl inside tells me, over and over again.

The Only Offer

That first offer could very well be the only offer! ... A friend's recent foray into house-hunting resulted in a back and forth tug of signatures and the all-important and almighty house inspection. It would seem that the sellers, being quite adamant in what they were prepared to do or not do, lost sight of the point of the exercise: a give and take, to close the deal. It was a 'my house, my rules' sort of stance... Considering there were obvious flaws with the house that should have been remediated before the property was even listed, the whole affair became more complicated and stressful with each passing day. The sale failed. ... Our friends bought elsewhere - easily - in the neighbourhood! Lesson learned: be realistic, be smart, be nice.

I was in my early twenties, in a small town, on my first teaching assignment, when our used car stopped working. We could no longer afford to fix it. We placed an ad in the newspaper, hoping for a quick sale. ...(Public transportation was non-existent so another used car was a top priority, immediately.) An offer came in at $200 less than our $600 asking price. The buyer, a gentleman battling a debilitating illness, was serious about buying our car as we were about selling it. ... Though my husband had hoped for a higher offer, I cautioned him against turning down what could very well be the only offer on the table. Who doesn't want their asking price accepted?... A 'no sale' was very imminent and an albatross could soon become an extended member of our family. ...Our car sold quickly making everyone very happy.

In today's buy and sell market, we must be ever so vigilant in thinking that our house, car, or special piece of furniture is so unique that we must not veer from our asking price. Remember, an asking price is simply our opinion on what we think the value is, sometimes overblown, or undervalued, in today's market.... Market conditions, (an intangible), can influence an object's value but also what interested parties, (a tangible), can conceivably afford. ... These have a bearing on the final offer. 

We all have something called living expenses that come first before any other frill-even the so-called buying of a house or a car can be considered. Affordability is the name of the game for both sides of the sale. The important thing to remember: things can always get out of hand. ... Selling your much cherished item for less than asking is not the worse thing that can happen.

During the heyday of rising house prices, decades ago, a house lay dormant on the market until an offer came in at around $40-$50,000 under asking. ... At this point, prices had been steadily climbing just before its customary 'correction'. Surprise! The correction started its downward spiral during the sellers turn at the 'wheel of fortune'... The above 'reasonable' offer was turned down, not signed back or anything. Simply refused.. The property languished on the market for well over a year and was finally re-listed for over $100,000 less than the original asking price: double the difference of the previous year, low ball offer.. Oh, to go back in time and re-live the moment and undo our decisions. 

It would seem that a reasonable offer is what any of us can hope for or expect. Sometimes, no offer results. Being right about our beliefs in what we are trying to sell can be very costly. Remember, we think that way for all the reasons we cite. Maybe, we are wrong in some of our thinking... The buyer is simply showing interest and hoping to get the best deal the same way we are hoping for the best deal. We are both working different sides of the same equation and hoping for the best outcome possible. How much are we prepared to lose? Being inflexible can be a costly mistake. Where house prices are concerned we are our own worst enemies, sometimes. 

Housing used to be a long-term investment - even if the appreciation of its value was low over decades. Now, we have houses being flipped quickly to garner a big chunk of money. Can we apply this analogy of getting the best deal to the choosing of our life partner? Is he tall, dark and handsome? Is she slim, gorgeous and long legged? Are we bringing as much to the table as we expect others to bring to it? If the 'merchandise' doesn't 'look' like the package we've envisioned, then  there is no deal. 

Qualities of trust, loyalty and devotion are what matter most in any relationship. (And helping out with the dishes, too.) ... Close your eyes and listen to the person who isn't your type. He or she just might be exactly what you are looking for. In a dark room, at night, while at work, in the kitchen preparing dinner, cleaning the house, during lengthy conversations on the phone or texting or emailing, we all 'look' the same. The tone of a realtionship is very important.

What we hear and feel are the most important criteria for 'closing' the relationship deal. Laying the blame of past misdeeds of former companions on the doorstep of our newest one is an unfair and misplaced indictment. If we want to close the deal, we need to be 'present' and reasonable, ever so reasonable!

The Spell of Uncommon Vegetables

“Hands off my rutabaga”, he remarked, harshly.  I backed away, slowly, as to not be noticed that another piece had been taken. ... It was leftover night and there was only enough food for one of us. I would scrounge around for something else that would nourish my soul, not necessarily my body. (“Where was the ice-cream”, I thought?) He'd had a grueling day and deserved a real meal. ...This evening's menu would include chicken cutlet, mashed potato made with goat's milk and the rutabaga, cubed and ready to go. A salad with homemade dressing would accompany it. He loved rhubarb so a dressing was made using this fruit, pureed with a few other fruits, added to balsamic vinegar, maple syrup, oil and seasonings.

Rutabaga is a family favourite, in addition to brussels sprouts, spinach, bok choy, and other lesser known and popular veggies. Containing fat soluble vitamins - (A, D, K, E,) - key nutrients for optimum human health - these uncommon vegetables are nutrient rich powerhouses, enhanced by the addition of fat. (Vit. B and C are water soluble)... Fat-free is not a good strategy and the kind of fat is what matters most. Trans fat is bad. With scrambled eggs, I sometimes add a serving of brussels sprouts, steamed lightly, just enough to take the crunch away, then flavoured with a hint of butter, maybe coconut oil and a dash of nutmeg. ... Since becoming a brussel sprouts aficionado, I have improved the cooking of these health gems. ... Leaving them whole is not my answer, I have discovered. The outside becomes overcooked while waiting for the heat to reach the center of these miniature cabbages. I now cut them in half, from top to bottom and lie them face down in the pot. Cooking time has been greatly reduced.

It is amazing how an tweak here and there can vastly improve the taste of vegetables, rarely included in our diet. Some hardy vegetables are better eaten steamed rather than raw, anyway, something to do with its raw affect on the thyroid gland. (Momsey's thyroid is such a slowpoke. Momsey is not!) ... Squash, onions, sweet potatoes and garlic are also high on my list of yummy health foods. They all add incredible flavours while satisfying my appetite and boosting immunity, all around. Momsey sometimes thinks she's had dessert. Barbecuing these vegetables, using indirect heat with a dab of coconut/olive oil and/or butter adds a new dimension of flavour when all these 'foods' are thrown together. A little always goes a long way.

My love affair with vegetables began as a child, starting with pickled hot banana peppers, part of my mother's summer canning ritual. A caraway/rye bread sandwich with slices of pickled pepper, topped any dessert back then. Along with salads, they were my comfort foods, a simple, healthier version of 'dessert'. Homemade pickles, everyone's favourite food, completed another package for me. In the last few years, I have ventured into the world of zucchini, eggplant, sweet potatoes and using red cabbage more often in salads. Making the famous sweet and sour cabbage has never been so easy. Its accompaniment to schnitzel and spaetzle is a dinner-time hit. We are what we eat so it behooves us to try new vegetables and incorporate them into our diet in as many different ways as possible. Disguising them helps us to benefit from their nutritional content as well as their taste and texture.

Lately, I've begun thinking about raw garlic, a prebiotic, - a top food flavour guru and health star - in making chocolate cake. Could that ever happen? ... If carrots and zucchini can be disguised, in cakes, then maybe, there is a way to incorporate garlic, too. Coffee liquid would need to be used to help mask the garlic's pungent flavour of course. It is worth pursuing since Momsey loves mocha chocolate cakes and garlic - not necessarily at the same time.

At the bottom of my list of rarely eaten vegetables would have to be the parsnip. Once upon a time, I made something called parsnip patties, a eerily looking burger that tasted quite unique. I had forgotten about my early experience with this unusual vegetable. Recently, I have begun to pair it with popular ones like 'bay leaves', carrots, celery and onions in making chicken soup/broth. Parsnip adds a subtle character to this 'medicinal' mixture. When these pairings are missing, there is a discernible difference in overall flavour. Fresh cilantro, parsley, dill, thyme and other herbs add fresh, unblemished flavour to your meals bringing with them a cleansing feel to eating and to the body.

Experimenting with recipes opens the door to finding new and exciting ways to introduce all vegetables into our meal time preparation. When we think of comfort foods, vegetables should be right at the top of the list. Move over ice cream, apple pie and chocolate cake.  For Momsey - rutabaga, brussel sprouts, bok choy and bean sprouts are here to stay - to comfort me, too.

Our Preemie's Miracle Machines!

My introduction into motherhood was stark and without warning. ... The year was 1979. He arrived 13 weeks too soon, with no chance of survival. ... The internet did not exist, then. We found ourselves in a medical maelstrom: trying to help save the life of our three-month-premature baby at a time when little could be done for his stage of development. His zero chance of survival, at birth, was soon upgraded to a 10% chance - two days later - when the doctors learned their new patient would be immediately receiving shipments of mother's milk - both fresh and frozen - 7 mornings a week. This elixir of life would become an awesome secret weapon in our son's arsenal of bacteria fighting tools. ...  But soon more 'help' than we could have ever imagined would arrive to assist us in our fight to keep our son alive!

Manual milk expression began in earnest, the afternoon of his birth. It was a tedious and sometimes messy labour of love, to be sure. It was also an experience of ignorance as I began to question the nurse what to do, how to do it and would I explode, somehow? (We had just begun prenatal classes, the week prior.) ... She helped me with the basics and reassured me that I was not at risk of exploding! ...  Warm cloths would help release the pressure and the milk, the creamy, nutrient rich food my body was producing immediately after his birth. We were  part of a grandiose team effort.... From the beginning, milk production was able to keep pace with the dietary needs of our three pound two ounce preemie, whose weight  had dropped to two pounds twelve ounces, days later. It was easy to give him what he needed, though collecting it was sometimes a challenge. ... Using a hand held plastic 'horn' like tool, I collected, dutifully, round the clock and stored the milk in the fridge for immediate use; the freezer, for any excess. (Human milk's 'shelf' life was poor.) While in hospital our son grew one ounce per day.

Arriving home two months later, our son would begin to gain valuable ounces. His nutritional demands, though, began to outpace my ability to accommodate his burgeoning weight status. (Formula supplementation was added as needed) Though he was now home, more relaxed, in a less fretful state and in a more stress free environment, he still could not get the 'knack' of nursing. The 'latching' technique was unfamiliar to him. He had grown used to feeding the easy way, using the bottle with its familiar rubber nipple. Whenever I tried introducing him to the 'nursing technique', he would struggle to latch on. It was not good. If he wasn't able to feed directly from me, easily, then I simply continued as before: collecting and storing the milk in bottles - as I had for the past two months while he lay in hospital. ...

The curse of all premature babies, especially male preemies, was the bacterial army invading their digestive tract, slowly destroying the linings of this vast food delivery network. .(Mom's milk was the key to battling these internal diseases, I learned only two years ago.) ... I contacted the La Leche League, in 1979, an organization for nursing moms, for advice...It was here that I would discover the existence of two miracle machines that would literally change our lives overnight! The complete feeding routine would be facilitated in two dramatic ways. ...One machine would literally empty the milk ducts in record time while the other machine would facilitate the nursing technique for our son, as I held him close. ... Results were immediate and incredible!. Teaching him on my own would have proved a lengthy trial and futile, at best, frustrating him further and reducing milk production to perilous levels. These new methods were simple to use and produced excellent results, each and every time. ...We rented these miracle machines for as long as was needed. ... (Perfection never looked so good!) ...  Gaining weight was critical to our son's health and strength. ...  Since his sucking reflex was still immature and underdeveloped, the one machine, rented for him, helped our baby gain valuable 'work' experience. By 4 months of age, he was able to nurse on his own, a remarkable learning accomplishment, considering the feeding struggles he had endured. ... Partnering with a machine, I had never heard of, to help teach our son how to breastfeed succeeded beyond our wildest dreams. ... The more frequently he nursed, the more milk was produced and the stronger he became. Life settled into a wonderful routine.

Our first-born was nearly five months old when the milk supply dried up. A second preemie was on his way. Though our second child would 'attempt' to assert his independence by 5 months gestation, he remained sequestered, with medical intervention, until birth, arriving one month early. Since I was a poor candidate for pregnancy, we did not wait. Our third child was born nearly two years later, 6 weeks early. ...

Our dogged determination to do what was necessary for our first born preemie and the lengths we went to help him survive, helped pave the way for our sons' own focused learning journeys, in years to come. We did what we had to do! Freedom never tasted so good!

"The Night The World Exploded"

The year was 1957 when The Night the World Exploded was released. This science fiction thriller, depicting civilization on the brink of extinction from worldwide earthquakes, was one of many science- based motion pictures of that era. ... A scene in the movie shows an 'electrodata machine that thinks like a brain' occupying a whole room where scientists are working. This chilling moment seemed to foretell of greater things to come. Today, our modern day 'electrodata machine' is called a desktop computer and is able to store, to memory, millions of pieces of data. Imagine, the computer was coming of age in an original 'old' motion picture from the golden age of Hollywood - over 60 years ago! ... How prophetic. ... Hollywood and science, it would seem, are bankable stars, an unbeatable combination, in teaching us about the future. ...  

Are today's movies reliable delivery systems of scientific information? ... As they entertain us, are they also portraying the endless possibilities that exist for us, too?... I was intrigued by the words and wisdom in The Night the World Exploded, whose simple dialogue provided insights into the earth's changing status - 60 years ago! ... As the movie unfolds, a scientist remarks, “We've mistreated the earth so long it's amazing it has lasted this long”. Today, we have documentaries that have put this theory to the test, in many different treatises, to see what would happen to civilization, if man's basic 'survival' elements - clean water, sunlight, food sources and heat- changed dramatically. ... Near the end of the movie, in a scene reminiscent of many in science fiction movies, a law enforcement officer remarks, “It's dangerous living today”. after being warned that volunteering to help these scientists might be risky to his life. ... It seems that movies from the 50's, whose Hollywood-style special effects are primitive by today's standards, were still credible scientific vehicles, then, giving us a taste of what science- disguised as mother nature - had in mind for us down the road. ... 

Many of today's big screen sci-fi thrillers, television documentaries and series hypothesize, then give credence to the creative ideas/processes of those silly motion picture ideas of Hollywood's golden age. ... .. Movies from the 50's such as Invasion of the Body Snatchers, War of the Worlds, and an all time family favourite, Creature From the Black Lagoon gave audiences suspense filled action throughout while introducing the audience to yet another layer of the absurd or unbelievable, in science. In the recent sci-fi thriller, War of the Worlds, starring Tom Cruise, an incredible adaptation of the original was created. ... In this newer version, a more futuristic format with more frightening implications takes the audience to a place where man is no longer master of his own fate and is now simply prey for this new predatorial life form-from another planet.----Then we have Jurassic Park, the gold standard of all things 'science'. ...What more can be said here?

There are lessons to be learned when we watch movies from the past. ...I was a little girl when movie characters brought the realm and realism of science fiction and all other genres into my very small world. ..There was horror, mystery/suspense, romance and comedy. ... Mature stars, such as Claude Rains, Lon Chaney, Lauren Bacall, Cary Grant, Lucille Ball, Humphrey Bogart, and Brian Donlevy, brought the audience incredible plot lines delivered with spot-on dialogue to match, in clear, concise tones in recognizable voices. The scripts/plot lines of a bygone era brought us entertainment in all forms. For me, the magic was always in the actors' dialogue. ... The words meant something as they moved the action. Today, not all movies are for 'family' viewing. And why are some forms of dialogue so painful to hear? What is the point other than to embarrass and restrict the younger 'patrons of the arts' from participating? 

In movies' golden age, character development seemed to matter. Dialogue mattered more. The people- otherwise known as actors - delivered the plotlines, crisply, thoughtfully and with integrity. ... All movies were for family viewing. ...We may laugh at old movies' primitive style but many of today's big screen wonders have been re-imagined on the backs of those movies from the golden age of Hollywood. ... Perhaps we rely too much on the magic of computer graphics, special effects and other incredible feats of mechanical and artistic genius, to the extreme, to bring realism to the audiences today. ...

I am thrilled to be able to revisit movies from today's recent past as well as from the golden age of Hollywood. I am drawn to the savvy 'literary' content, believable plots and plausible endings. Today, I watched an 'old' 1984 movie, “Beverly Hills Cop” starring Eddie Murphy. I laughed as I listened and worked nearby. The movie is timeless. Now, that's entertainment!

High School: Testing the Limits of Thought and Reason

High school became the 'adult' training ground for our three sons. The period from grades 9-12/13 would be a beginning, a tumultuous time of deep reflection, daily decision-making, a crucial period of testing the limits of thought and reason! 

The 'familial' association that had become a cornerstone of their lives, since birth, was now up close and personal, in every choice they made. ... They had been living with the people who had raised them, cared for them and understood them well. The time for flight was soon approaching. ...

Adulthood had arrived - years before it was officially mandated. This burgeoning 'apprenticeship' program was now in effect!... High school was here, baiting their every want and need. Our sons had the size, intellect and will to do as they pleased, they were  told. But there was a cost to this bravado! Indeed there was. (Everything we do has a cost, they were reminded.) 

Peer pressure, of all stripes, was now up close and personal, demonstrating its unrelenting power over mind and body. ... A whole new perspective and directive now influenced everything our sons did, thought and felt. These were the new 'formative' years. Real life with real meaning had arrived ... These daily reminders of life's choices and the lessons learned from these decisions would take them into the future. 

The talk to the teachers, have you done your homework, it's time for bed mentality of the 'elementary' school period was gone. In its place, a new day had arrived. ... Boundaries were set with very clear expectations given, with consequences a real threat to their daily lives. Their opinions, thoughts, ideas would now have 'immediate' life impact. They were living in this real life 'simulator', the effects of which would be felt for years to come.

Every interaction with people or animals tells us a personal truth about ourselves. Early on, our sons' connection with pets, gave them insights into another kind of truth about people and the cruelty, sometimes, shown these powerless, vulnerable animal creatures. (The world was not always a kind, peaceful, reasonable or loving place for man or beast.) 

This 'early bonding' with animals (dogs, cats, and other animals, lizard's or bunnies, perhaps) helped our boys build strong emotional ties, reminding them of the significance of the animal world on man's health and future.. (One day, they would all become pet owners themselves to a host of rescued animals - as mom and dad had done before them.)

There was a conundrum to living at home, however. It was called mom and dad, these 'master's' of their fate. ...Our simple philosophy: “Be nice. act responsibly, help out and do your best in whatever endeavour you undertake, and wherever you go” gave them clear guidelines as to what was expected, each and every day. 

Spending earnings from part time jobs - while living at home - had consequences called paying their share of household/living expenses, a common affliction facing all who call themselves adults. ... Our sons could keep their money or give us half, if they chose to spend, at their discretion. The choice was theirs. They could not have it both ways. Life did not work that way. (Having 100% discretionary income was an illusion! ) 

There were bills to be paid, rent/mortgage/ house/car insurance costs, house and car repair bills, vet bills, hydro, groceries, etc. - costs associated with living an independent life.  Living at home, while in high school, was a benefit, never to be taken lightly. (The front door was a daily reminder, showing them there was 'another' way!) They learned very quickly the significance of current financial decisions and the future 'purchasing' power of money saved. This understanding and appreciation of money's power would bode well for them. It would be one of life's greatest lessons. 

Their reputation and credit rating now had real meaning, never to be taken lightly, under any circumstances! Financial misdirection, early on, can have serious repercussions, later. They knew.  As long as our sons saved most of their hard earned money and spent almost nothing, access to their largess remained largely intact, for their future use, when they no longer lived at home. The future was an unknown, with unpredictable outcomes. 

Being prepared was the key to financial security and security in general. (Our sons never asked for money and were reluctant to accept it. Their gratitude was evident. This philosophy holds true to this day.) The use of the family cars was a privilege. It was here that our sons learned about liability, the law, the rules of the road and the dire consequences of flaunting such directives. 

The purchase of a car, an expensive depreciating transportation machine, was never a buying consideration. It made no sense. It was simply a necessary tool never to be revered as a status symbol. They knew. Other costs came first. They were grateful simply to 'rent' the vehicle whose owners allowed them 'conditional' access. 

With university/college looming large the horizon, the daily lessons of high school life kept things lively and real, every day of the week. With this newly acquired concept called 'freedom', came its nemesis - consequences. It would help establish a respectful appreciation for reaching adulthood, a reflective time that guided their every move. Though we had stopped parenting our sons many years ago, it was now their turn to be in charge. A new learning curve was now in place. The real fun was just beginning!